Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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