butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
