Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize