Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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