Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
