is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize