so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
