yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
