we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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