evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
