Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
