dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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