I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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