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Sponge bath it is.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
This is the prime rib incident all over again
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
