sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
