So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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