nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
