big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
