I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
