You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
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