Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
