that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
