i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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