dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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