I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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