so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
