allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
