doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
