her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
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