Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
