I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
