Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
