VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
this boner is exhausting
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
