just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
