Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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