Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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