I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
