Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
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