So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
4 words: hood of his car
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We are all done wearing pants today
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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