CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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