That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
