It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
third nipple confirmed
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
