these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
