dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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