It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
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