You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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