Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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