what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
P.S. I can't hear my feet
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Randomize
