How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
