This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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