maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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